Hidden Passages: Gothic Horror/Romance

i'm feeling that spring freak out where all of a sudden my planning systems just don't feel right anymore. i'm very much a printed out, physical, analog type of planner but i alternate between designing things in canva and printing them out for an archive and craving the crinkly page sensation of a written out entry with a ballpoint on some paper. and the thing is, what i have right now is working, in a sense. i'm meeting my deadlines for my courses and i'm memory keeping with my semi-digital archive. i've even started another little space (a completely adapted a6 original from hobonichi) to be my creative notebook, where i keep all my endeavors in there. but something's just...not quite working out, sensation wise. 

i want something chunky, with the crinkly page feel. but i don't want to go back to a5; i don't think i have enough going on at the moment to warrant so much space. i'm currently using a b6 slim for my planner, where i keep track of my course assignments and life admin stuff i have to do, along with birthdays, holidays, and deadlines, and that feels great. i love making my to-do list every day because i get to be within the book. 

and i love my rings journal too (in the personal, 6 ring size), because aesthetically it's absolutely stunning, and i can fit a lot in there because i print my pages out. the filofax paper is nice to print on, and i love flipping through to remind myself of this little archive of my life. it's so helpful for the foggier days in my brain. 

but i want to merge the two, almost. i love the page size, and don't want to move up or down a size. but i want to be able to do some more handwriting while also being able to do some sticker decorating, memory keeping, and having the functionality to be able to move things around. 

i've been considering the travelers notebook system again - i briefly tried it out as a personal planner from september 2025 - november 2025 because i just needed to get into the new year for a planner system - but i worry the regular size is too big, given that it's basically an a5 slim. and i don't want to spend more money than i have to but my system isn't feeling right anymore and i'm worrying that it's going to break down, or i'll stop up keeping the rings. which would suck because that's my mindfulness moment, is opening the canva file and going in and really thinking about my day and what it was like. 

i could go for some different personal rings inserts to encourage me handwriting things out. but i only have the one personal sized rings book and i worry that the clash of aesthetics would turn me off from it entirely. i did order some dividers though (finally) so maybe if i have a section of it as my handwriting, crinkly page section, it wouldn't interfere so much with the slim printed pages? 

much to think about, i'm just bummed that i have to think about it at all 😞

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